Making Friends While Studying Abroad

"Study abroad changed my life" usually means "the people I met changed my life." Friendships are often the thing returnees treasure most. Yet in the first weeks, many students feel lonelier than they ever expected. Everyone seems to speak a language you only half understand, in groups that have been together for years. The good news is that friendships do form, and there are reliable ways to help them along.

Everyone's experience differs. This guide offers general ideas, and is not a guarantee. It is general information.

Expect the first weeks to be awkward

It takes time for friendships to form, anywhere. Abroad, you also face:

• Jet lag, tiredness and information overload.
• Language barriers, even if you speak the language fairly well.
• Cultural differences in humor, personal space and ways of making plans.
• Existing friend groups among local students.
• Homesickness.
• Different rhythms, such as late dinners or early classes.

Almost everyone feels uncertain at first. Remember that other international students are in the same position, and are often eager to meet people.

Where to meet people

At orientation. This is the easiest time to start conversations. Attend all events, and say hello to people next to you.

In your housing. Introduce yourself to housemates and neighbors, leave your door open sometimes and share meals. Our guide to finding accommodation abroad explains how housing affects social life.

In class. Sit with different people, ask questions about assignments and suggest study sessions.

In clubs and societies. Sports, music, art, hiking, volunteering, cultural groups and academic societies are all good options. Choose one or two and commit.

In language exchanges and tandems. Many universities and cities have meetups where you practice a language in exchange for helping others.

Through volunteering. Working together on a shared task is an easy way to build relationships.

At student-run events and trips. Many universities and international student networks organize excursions, parties and dinners.

Online and in local groups, with caution. Use official university groups first.

Local students, international students and people from home

A balanced social life draws on all three.

Aim to have friends in at least two of these groups. Spending time with people from home is fine, especially when you need comfort, but do not let it replace new experiences.

Meeting local students

Local students may be busy with their own lives and not used to approaching foreigners. You may need to take the first step.

• Ask for help, such as tips on classes or places to eat. People like being asked.
• Join activities where you share a task, like a team or a project.
• Be curious about their lives and culture.
• Offer to share your culture, by cooking a dish or telling stories.
• Be patient. Friendships with locals may take longer.
• Accept invitations, even to things that feel outside your comfort zone.
• Learn the local language, even a little. Effort is appreciated.

Overcoming language barriers

• Start with simple conversations. Everyday topics are fine.
• Ask people to speak slowly or repeat.
• Use gestures, translation apps and humor.
• Learn common phrases and slang.
• Do not worry about mistakes. Most people appreciate your effort.
• Practice every day, even briefly.
• Listen actively. Understanding grows quickly with exposure.

Our guide to studying abroad in English vs another language explains how language choice shapes social life.

Understanding cultural differences

• Greetings and personal space vary.
• Directness differs. Some cultures are more blunt, others more indirect.
• Punctuality is flexible in some places and strict in others.
• Making plans may be spontaneous or arranged far ahead.
• Humor and sarcasm may not translate.
• Food, alcohol and religion can affect social activities.
• Gift-giving and hosting customs differ.

Observe, ask questions and avoid assuming that your way is the default. If you offend someone by accident, apologize sincerely.

Make plans and say yes

Friendship grows from repeated contact.

• Say yes to invitations, within your comfort and safety limits.
• Suggest simple plans: coffee, a walk, a study session or a meal.
• Be the one to organize now and then.
• Follow up after meeting someone, with a message.
• Keep trying. Not every connection will become a friendship.

Small, repeated interactions matter more than one big night out.

Handle loneliness

• Recognize that it is common.
• Keep a routine: sleep, meals, exercise and study.
• Get out of your room, even for a short walk or a coffee.
• Reach out to home, but not so much that you avoid new connections.
• Join one activity regularly, so that you see familiar faces.
• Talk to someone at the program office or host's counseling center if you feel low for a long time.
• Be kind to yourself.

Staying safe when meeting new people

• Meet in public places at first.
• Tell a friend where you are going.
• Watch your drinks, and do not accept drinks from strangers.
• Trust your instincts.
• Be cautious about sharing personal details or your address.
• Respect boundaries, yours and others'.
• Know local laws and norms around dating, alcohol and public behavior.

Friendships and identity

Your identity may affect how you experience social life abroad.

• International students of color, religious minorities and LGBTQ+ students may face particular challenges or find special communities.
• Students with disabilities may need accessible venues and support.
• Introverts may prefer small gatherings and one-to-one conversations.
• Older and graduate students may find different social networks than undergraduates.

Look for groups that suit you, and be open about your needs.

Keeping friendships after you leave

• Exchange contact details and social media.
• Take photos together.
• Plan visits or reunions.
• Send messages on birthdays and holidays.
• Share news and updates.
• Introduce friends to each other.
• Keep practicing the language with them.

A friendship does not end when you board the plane.

A worked example

Imagine a student who feels lonely after two weeks in a new city. She talks to her housemate, who invites her to a weekly language exchange. There she meets a local student who suggests joining a hiking club. She goes, meets more people and starts to understand the local slang. She also keeps a weekly dinner with other international students from her program. By the end of the semester, she has a mixed group of friends, and promises to visit them.

Her friendships grew from small steps and regular contact.

Conversation starters that work

Starting a conversation is often the hardest part, so keep a few easy openers ready. Ask about the class ("Did you understand the reading for tomorrow?"). Ask about the place ("Where do you go for good cheap food around here?"). Ask about them ("What brought you to this program?"). Questions that invite a recommendation work especially well, because people enjoy sharing what they know.

Listen to the answer and ask a follow-up. People remember who was interested in them.

Be the host sometimes

Do not wait to be invited. Cook a dish from home and invite housemates, organize a movie night or suggest a Sunday walk. Hosting gives others an easy reason to say yes, and it turns you from a newcomer into a connector. Even a simple tea or coffee counts.

Give friendships time

Close friendships rarely form in the first month. Expect a slow build: familiar faces, then regular plans, then real trust. If your first few attempts feel flat, try a different group or activity rather than concluding that you are the problem. The right people are usually there.

Common mistakes

• Waiting for others to approach.
• Staying only with people from your country.
• Giving up after one awkward attempt.
• Saying no to everything.
• Expecting instant best friends.
• Comparing everything with home.
• Not looking after your wellbeing.

A quick checklist

• Have I joined at least one club or activity?
• Do I have a mix of local, international and home friends?
• Am I practicing the local language?
• Do I have a plan for loneliness?
• Do I have a way to stay in touch after I leave?

Final thoughts

Friendships abroad take courage and time, and they are often the most lasting part of the experience. Be curious, take small steps and keep showing up. The people you meet may change how you see the world.